The smile of a Father

This past Saturday, my lady an I finalized the progress of commitment to one another and we became married! I cannot begin to describe the roller coaster of emotion involved in the process. Between the food, the clothes, the invites, the decorations, the timeline, phone calls, emails, and the like. Side note too, We catered ninety percent of it, and decorated almost all of it ourselves. So ya, stress!

But everything went over so well. So awesome too! I was never once nervous about the fact of being married. I was very excited for that. I have no problem being in front of people either so there was no real stress there. My two biggest worries were in this order; 1.) Make sure the Bride is happy, excited, and stress free, 2.) Do not screw up the Pumpkin Pasta. That was the headliner in the three main dishes, and it was a modified recipe my lady designed and I was bulk making it for an estimated one hundred people. Plus I made a side order specifically for a friend of mine who is allergic to onions. But I wanted him to eat some, so I batched it!

Once it all went down, it went smooth, clean, no stress, no fights, and everyone loved the food. They Loved my bride! They enjoyed the music, the drinking, the atmosphere. It was a success!

But I am not writing so much to recap what most of my readers will already know or soon know about our wedding. I am actually wanting to write about the goodness of God! Now of all the things I could relate to God through weddings and marriage, I am going to dodge really. I am actually wanting to just write about this conversation I had with my dad while we stood in the back of the festivities and talked.

It was about an hour into the dancing. Food was almost all gone. Everyone was starting to get their bodies moving. Drinks go round. I came out from the back, grabbed a beer and began to wonder. I stopped in the back to just watch what was happening. At that point my dad walked over and stood with me. I am pretty sure I gave him a huge hug. Told him THANK YOU, for maybe the tenth time and smiled. Told him again that I really liked his outfit, (classic gentleman slacks and shoes, with a gentleman's vest and tie, salmon color button up t.) We stood for a minute and just talked about small stuff. But then I smiled real big and he looked at me in wonder. So when I saw his expression I began to tell him what was on my mind.

As I looked around again I told em how awesome it was to have all of our guests there. How interesting it was to see such cultured people from such unique backgrounds and stories. At one table was some members of my family, and my ladies sister and mother with their significant others. Another table was my ladies dad's side of the family including her little brother. Then as you scan the other seven tables, I noticed we had them seated in specific groups. Totally un-intentional. At three tables were the members of Modified k9 Family and Rise Above Team. At another table was friends who also own animal related businesses. At a different table was the people we knew from the tattoo shop, and a final table was our friends from the Vegan culture. Also business owners.

I then began to tell him the story about when my lady and I relocated here. After being her for a year or so we decided to open up our own company. An Art and Advocacy Group that would use it's talents in art's and animals, and volunteering to reach out to it's community. This eventually grew, and the animals became their own identity in Pit Bulls. And Modified k9 was born. So there we were, two late twenty somethings with a new baby boy and that was about it. After thinking about it for a bit, and doing some brainstorming and thinking, we made "it" a part of both business plans. The "it" I am talking about, Family!

My ladies family mostly lives in New Jersey with the exception of her mom. My family is scattered. Mainly living in Florida and Rhode Island, with a brother in Chicago. So we did not have any family really around us, and as everyone knows, Family keeps you in check. Family is what keeps you grounded, and Family is where we belong.

So after telling my dad about all the table collectives, I told him what was so cool, was that we could have rearranged any of them, and almost all of them would still know each other. Nothing would be awkward. I told him how it was so awesome to look around the room and see Family. Not just blood, but loving choice Family. People that live life with us. People that help us. People we help. People with purpose, mission, and culture that we can both learn and teach one another. At any given time we could call on any of them and they us, and we would be there the best we could to do almost anything for one another. And I smiled again! As did he. He gave me that proud dad smile again, that he has given to me plenty of times before.

Being a dad, I understand that look. To see your child learn, succeed, achieve, and just be what they are supposed to be is one of the greatest gifts of parenthood. I love seeing my son learn something new, and get excited about it, and show me what he learned right then as he learns it! I believe my dad was thinking that right then as I was explaining. I believe he was seeing my past fall off of me and my future form in front of me, quite literally. My mom was the same way at multiple occasions that night as well. Stopping to hug me and my lady and tell us how proud she was, and how excited she was. As a matter of fact wise, I believe we were stopped by everyone of our family and friends that night. I joked all day while seeing the pre wedding social network posts. I said it felt like the world was ending for us all and our wedding was the final going out  with a bang!

But I say all this for something much heavier than my satisfaction. I say all this because as I continue to recap it all, I cannot help but think about how amazing God really is. In all of the garbage, and all of the good, and all of the middle areas, He alone is ALWAYS good to me. To Us. All of us!

My lady and I made it a point to try and create a Family atmosphere in all that we do. We aim to have unconditional love to all those we can provide it too. We fall short at times. But we are only humans, dealing with temptation and selfishness as we strive to be one with our God. To be holy for Him. But we were not always in line with Him. Truthfully, we were more at times, living on the wide path. The comfortable; "I got this, I know what I am doing" sort of path. Not really ever praying, or confirming with Him what it is He wants us to do. Just kind of using our knowledge and skills and doing what we knew.

But through all the stuff that we did, and were a part of, He still blessed us with so much. So many opportunities, people, places, lives and just everything. He knew our hearts in all their purity, even when we shoveled trash on top of them, and accepted the general populations way of life instead of His. He knew we wanted a Family, and we wanted to share our gifts, our stories, or culture, our lives. All of these in which He blessed us with. And in wanting all of these things, it lined us up in His will. Even if we were not conscious of it. And like a Loving Father, He blessed us beyond words.

He gave me blood family. He gave me a family of friends. He gave me a wife and a son. He gave us successful businesses. He gave us His world. He gave us His Son. All of this we have accepted with the understanding that it in His Glory and Name. We accept it. We believe it. Everyday, we do our best to Live it. I would do just about anything for all of those who were there to celebrate with us this past weekend. I will also do whatever I can for all of those who were not there this past weekend, regardless if I know you or not.

And as my dad did with me at my wedding, and as I do to my son when he tells me stuff, I believe God smiles down on us now with that proud Father smile. We are where He wants us, and He saw that it was good!