4.19.2013

Phyllis

A lot of times while talking about my Faith, people tend to want to hear some facts that can prove that what I believe in is real. That it is truth, it is unshakably honest, and without a doubt the one and only way. Well, I'm sorry. Most of the things I talk about are experiences and happenings that I cannot explain in a way that would make sense to Anyone who wants a materialistic fact.

I talk about some stories like the time I was called into a prayer circle of teenagers at the church I attended in Georgia. A young girl about 16 years old had been starving herself for around two weeks. Under the impression she was fat and disgusting and nobody, not even the boy she was going with, looked at her with an approving eye. This young girl shook uncontrollably as if she was trembling in fear. But she wasn't. She shook because she was ill, and to top it off she was cold to the touch. Cold to the touch inside a warehouse with no ac in the middle of summer in the south. I lead a prayer along with the pastors wife, and three of her close friends. I asked my God to take away the lies she had been told about her vanity, to comfort her and show her she was beautiful, regardless of what anyone else may think or say, that He loved her no matter what. I prayed that her health be restored, and her strength be regained. I prayed for a few more personal things at the request of her friends. This girl, removed her sweater while we were praying for her because she had begun to sweat. Her trembling relaxed and she stood still and calm. She cried. Not sadness this time, but joy. She was beginning to experience God''s love though those around her.

I use other smaller examples of prayer. The time I prayed over a little girl I once knew. She was torn up with the flu. So stuffed up and congested she could barely breath through her nose. She sneezed frequently. She was pale and sleepy and without energy for a few days. When she went to bed that night, I prayed to my God, I asked that he recognize her as his daughter and take the sickness away. She was a toddler. This sickness came out of nowhere in a season that was not a sick season. Little children should not have to suffer through that type of illness. The next day, she woke up with more energy than ever. Full of color, and smiles, and no trace of sleepiness. Sickness gone in hours with no medicines.

There is a long, long winded story I tell to some people. But I keep a lot of it to myself due to the fact that it involves demon spirits, angels, prayer in the spiritual language and a good friend of mine who at that time could visually see what it was we were fighting against while we fought it.

They all sound crazy to the unbeliever, the curious and even sometimes the ones who say they are faith filled. They will say, sickness was a mere twenty four hour bug. The starving girl just needed her mind to be calmed down with some kind words. Then the spiritual warfare story is just me making up something entertaining, or that I forgot to put in the part about drinking or drugs, (that were no where to be found in the house, let alone the story.)

So I tell them one of my favorite examples of how my Lord works. It's a story of a woman I met years ago. She was an awesome lady. Married for more years than most people can fathom. Over fifty years of marriage and devotion to her family and her husband. She was a mother to her kids, and her kid's kids. Hard edges, straight shooter and full of love. Her curse in this story, she was a smoker. From a young age she had taken up cigarettes. Over the years she made attempts to quit but only picked it up later down the line. The years of smoking did a number on her lungs and the behavior finally caught up with her. This is where this story picks up.

Early one morning around seven a.m. she called out from her room to her grandson, who happen to come in town a few weeks before, but he did not hear. As she struggled to breath, she called to him again but still went unnoticed. So she grabs the mask on her nebulizer machine and turns it up high to try and get some oxygen. After a few minutes she calls to her grandson again. This time, he hears her and comes into her room. "Call an ambulance, I can't breath," she says to him.

When the ambulance arrived, they came in and got her on board and carried her to the cart waiting in the living room. Later they said at pick up, she was only working nineteen percent oxygen in her blood supply. Levels low enough to cause her pass out, and close to death. The ambulance drove away and her grandson followed. After a few hours they had her conscious and stable. Hooked up to heart monitor, breathing machines, feeding tubes, and pain medicine, she was in a rough state. Later that day and for the next few days her family would come a visit her.

Midway through the week her grandson came back to see her. As he walked in her room he paused. Later mentioning how it was tough to see his grandma in that shape. Laid up in a bed, hooked to feeding tubes, oxygen lines and monitors. He went in the room and spent some time with her. They spoke through a note pad and pen. Because of the tubes in her thought, it was tough to understand what she was saying. After some conversation, he began to watch tv with her. He recalled The Price is Right being on. Classic midday tv. As they sat there he began to remembered a conversation a few months prior, when his grandma was telling him about the Jesus candle she had on her nightstand. When he pointed to it one day, she told him, "I enjoy reading them, it gives me hope." So he picked up he pen and began to write for a while.

After about a half hour of writing, he told his grandma he had to go. He had work. But before he left, he took a few minutes to explain the note he wrote to her. He told her that Jesus loves her. That God did not enjoy seeing her as sick as she was, that He was there with her even if she may not have noticed it. He continued to tell her that he remembered their conversation about the candle prayer, and that he wrote a prayer for her. But there was a slight difference.

"This prayer I wrote you," he said, " this is a prayer of forgiveness. Both asking and giving. I wrote it for you because I know you liked the candle ones. But if you read this one, I would like you to read it with your heart and not just your words."

He placed the note sheet on her lunch tray and said goodbye. Kissed her and hugged her and left to head to work. He didn't get to go back to the hospital again that week.

Now before I finish this story, and why I believe it to be a great testimony to my Fathers love for all of us, I need to share something from my story: This is about MY grandmother. I AM the grandson in tis story. This story took place two weeks after I had just moved back to my parents place following my life Georgia.

I have told this story a handful of people, and the reason It took a bit to share it openly, is because I wanted to be all in on the story. I didn't want to tell a story for the sake of sadness, or grief, or anything like that. But after telling it again to a few people recently, I realized I wanted to share it. Also, this story is as accurate as I recall it. And the details of the end are based on what I was told by my family.

After giving the prayer to my grandmother and saying goodbye, I left for work. I worked about an hour and a half away, and I promise you I cried for about half the trip. I was so sad to see my gramma in that state. She was like a super hero to me.

I didn't get to see her awake after that day. She passed away that weekend. I was told that some time during the night she was doing something and passed out, and didn't come back. But that's not what makes me share this story. The reason I share this story is the part I will talk about now.

Although I do not remember the exact words on the paper I gave my gramma, I can give a round about to the prayer I asked her to read. I wrote that Jesus loved her, and He wanted to be there to help her. To make her well and live again. I asked her to read these words with her heart; "God I am here. I am sorry for forgetting about you. I am sorry for living my life without you. Please forgive me. I am sorry for all that I have done without you. Please be a part of my life now and take me in to yours. Heal my heart and make me new." Then I said, if she believed these words and this prayer, to reread it with her heart. Let it be her confession.

I think it was two days after I had visited my gramma, when my mom called me at work with some news. I answered the phone and mom asked if I was able to go see her again. I told her no, but I was going too when my other brother got in town. She asked if I had known about the DNR papers gramma had signed for herself after my grampa passed. I told her I did not. She then began to tell me that I would have to go to her new room to visit. They moved her into her own room the night before. She had some breakfast earlier, and had been up and walking, and when they got to her room she had just finished eating her lunch and was picking out what she wanted for dinner. There were certain times I could go so I had to fix my schedule. All the while, I had a huge involuntary grin on my face. I had to have looked like an oddball to anyone who walked in the doors. My gramma was UP, on her feet and WALKING on her own. She ATE breakfast and lunch, and was picking our her dinner.

She ate without feeding tubes. She was walking and not laying in bed, stuck. She was out of the ER area and in her own room. Now I may sound like a nut, but how does a woman go from being hooked up to monitors, feeding tubes, oxygen and bed ridden one day, to walking down to her own room, eating and breathing on her own without machines, almost overnight? There may be a medical reason. There may be some details that were not all there or not told to me. But as far as I know, that is what was told to me by my mom and my dad, who both had been to see her those last days I hadn't.

I use this story now as part of my testimony about Christ. It's the unexplainable, and the experiences that tell His story. Not the facts and the proven details. I think too many people are chasing the facts. Wanting hard evidence over experience. Maybe because if we have an experience, we become accountable for what we do afterwards?

"Show me the scars, and let me put my finger in them," says Thomas.
Jesus told his followers, "You believe because you have seen, but there will be many who will have not seen and yet believe. They have true faith."

There are so many things about this life that are beautiful and magnificent proofs of creation. The works of an artist and a designer. There are more and more evidences surfacing, showing facts and proofs of the stories documented in the bible. But it is the experiences in things that helps us to believe what it is we are told.

Someone told me God loves me. Jesus was His son, the savior and the gateway to heaven. The Spirit of God would be my truth and my guide, my direct connection to my creator. Awakened in me when I testified my belief in Him and His son's resurrection from death as we knew it. For the longest time, I didn't really get it, I didn't believe, I didn't care. But then came a time when I needed more. Something or someone that could fulfill the needs. So I tried. I took a chance and looked to experience what everyone had told me about God, Jesus, the Spirit, the Bible.

I truly believe, that through that first decision made to find and experience God for who he truly is, and not what people tell me he is, has lead me to be able to say; When I get to Heaven, I will be able to hug my Grandmother!

Look for an experience. Be open to it. Pray. And be mindful of what you pray about. Be on the lookout for God to answer. Through His love and Grace . . . .

1.27.2013

Heart Attack

I cannot say I have met a lot of people in my life. Although I feel I have met a lot, most of those I have met I may not know to be true to the character they are. Of all the people and characters I have met I cannot say anyone has had a more true heart than the one person I adore most. It is currently 11pm on a Saturday night. Most people are out and about with friends right now having a good time. Or they are sleeping because they have work in the morning, or have church to go too. Technically the one I am about to talk to you about has both of them tomorrow.

I am relaxing on the couch watching an independent documentary on Wayne White. Look him up if your curious and do not know, cause this is not about him. But in the film, there was this ever present feeling of heart. The man loved what he did and did what he loved. All of which came naturally. That is living! He was an artist. Period. When the film ends, I begin to ponder what is currently going on. Selfishly I look at myself and get frustrated with the kind of agitation only artists and musicians can understand. The conflict between wanting to be out there producing and succeeding, and the struggle to stop being procrastinating and down on yourself with no real hope of your success. As this rattles around in my mind, I stop and begin to realize how blessed I am.

My son is currently sleeping. Peacefully he is in bed dreaming and having fun in whatever play land it is that God himself provides vision too. I look to my left and my right and I see my three dogs, also sleeping. The only one who is not here is my wife. She has been out for a few hours now on a mission. I don't mean a mission, like a vendetta or a have to do this, I mean a mission of the heart.

I assist my wife in running a education and advocacy group for pit bull dogs. We also rescue and foster as well. She is the brains and the educator in the overall project. For the last 15-20 years, she has devoted almost everyday of her life to helping and being around animals. Although the majority of them have been dogs, she has also spent a lot of time with birds, horses, cats, and the occasional exotic. Over the years she has clocked in countless hours of veterinary technician work and assistance, behavioral and obedience training, k9 police protection and search and rescue training, grooming for dogs and horse, cart racing and training with horses, canine good citizen and therapy dog work, companion animal training, and not to mention the all of the outlets she has used to help teach and train others. The stories she can tell about it all will entertain our grandchildren for days and days when we get older. For me, she has the most heart of anyone I have ever met so far in this life, and it continue to grows daily.

As I finish that paragraph, she returns home and fills me in on everything that had went on tonight while she was out on a call about a dog. Here it is late night on a Saturday, and she is still doing what comes natural to her. Loving these dogs.

This write up is about her. She is a motivation for me. She is a focus for me. She influences me daily and has influenced me over the past few years in some major ways. She will push you and challenge you to step up or step forward, because she cares. I have watched her answer texts and phone calls about animal questions at all hours of the day. Answering emails for weeks on end with the same people, asking the same questions, until they finally understand what it is she is teaching them. I have watched her do some amazing things with animals. I have seen the repercussions of her work through others who follow her. Humbly she accepts thanks, although a lot of times she fights it. For her the best thank you that you can provide would be doing what it is she has taught or showed you. Then pass it on to others who can use it as well. She loves what she does, because she does what she loves.

It has it's trials. It has it's ups and downs. There is a lot of pressure, pain, tension, stress, time, money, words, actions and soul, poured in day after day with what she does. It gets really hard sometimes for her to continue. I have been here for her many a times in the last few years when she has wanted to just stop it all and quit. I wouldn't blame her either. She has been non stop almost every day for two decades! What have you done that long? What have I done that long? She has done the above with an overflowing heart. Because of that, she knows she could never really quit. Every now and them she receives a message from someone, (sometimes from half way around the globe) that helps boost her up. People thanking her for doing what she does, and showing others how to do it. Being there for them when they have questions. Being there when they need help. Both personally and with their animals.

The most amazing part about this too, for the last four years, she has done it all while being a stay at home mom. That in itself (especially with our boy) is no easy task. He adds up to all three of our dogs and then some. But she does it. Full on, full time, full heart.

She loves God, she loves her family, she loves her animals. She loves Life! For all she has done, she is nothing short of amazing, and I blessed to have her as my wife. No matter how hard it gets, or how awesome things are, her heart is solid, and it is strong, and it will go until our father takes her home. I can bet your life will change when you get to experience it.

1.03.2013

The Garden

There is always a new feeling when the year starts over again. This year I can't help but begin to visually notice the destruction of the garden around us. Through the things I see with my own eyes, too the things I watch and read about online and in books or magazines. Different conservation groups engaged in literal war-zones. Activist being arrested for releasing caged and tortured animals. Freedom fighters engaged in battles of government and rebel armies over trafficking and slavery. Well builders in countries oppressed in war and without clean drinking water. Movements arising all over the planet for specific causes and purpose. It is a new generation of people starting to take the roles of leaders and go getters, and if they are interrupted or forced to move, they challenge that authority and force them to give them the answer to their question, "Why?"

The last few weeks of December 2012 and now into January 2013, I have been watching back episodes of Whale Wars. For those who may not know what that is, I will do a quick run down. Whale Wars is a show on Animal Planet that involves the Conservation Group, " The Sea Shepherds." Lead by Paul Watson, former founder of GreenPeace, who was dismissed from the organization for being to aggressive in his actions. He then started Sea Shepherds, and with his volunteer crews, they wage war against people and country who bend or break the laws of international sea fishing, whaling, shark hunting, and other forms of arctic wildlife exploitation.

As I continue to watch what it is this organization is doing, I cannot help and think to myself how amazing these people are. They are literally risking their lives in dangerous conditions and with no law or military back up. They aim to directly interfere with hostile forces. As I watch each episode, my insides get shaken up, and I feel like I am experiencing the same emotions that the crew is feeling at that time. It is a very odd emotional thing that happens, and I am not even there with them.

Back a few months ago I watched the movie "Bold Native." A fictional film based on real life activists. Groups of people who are taking up actions against animal testing, factory farming and fur trade operations to name a few. I am sure the is a lot of other things they compete with as well. Again, these individuals risk life, for the liberations of the animals who are involuntarily being treated with disrespect and emotionless torture. All for the sake a human consumption and greed.

Both the Sea Shepherds and the animal liberation groups that fueled Bold Native are considered terrorists by national governments. As well as Federal and International Governments. Threatened with charges of Piracy and Illegal interference of research and studies, the Sea Shepherds continue to press on and get in the face of the enemy. In the same regards, the Animal Liberation groups world wide are also tried as Terrorists. Not a minor charge. Terrorist as in 9/11 events style Terrorism. If caught in their actions and proven guilty of property damage or interference of whatever they interfere with, Activist face Federal Prison sentencing. For an act as small as trespassing and cage opening at a Mink Fur Farm, one activist couple I read about received 5 years Federal Prison. Still, after these threats and official crackdowns, these Activists put themselves in the face of he enemy.

I also follow other advocacy and activist websites online that challenge those who are willing to join the fight. Wether through petitioning, protesting, or physical involvement in legal grey area activities. These are organizations that are stepping to the front lines and challenging the "Traditional" ways of doing thing. They are backed by years of studies both medical and analytical, and they use these findings as fuel for their campaigns.

I do not only follow animal activist though. I try my best to follow and get involved in many human related issues. On a spectrum that ranges from Vegetarianism/Veganism to Fatherless Generation issues, Abortion, Environmental Conservation, Sex Trafficking, Child Labor Exploitation, and Child Soldiers. I also follow a few companies such as Tom's Shoes, EatArt, and WeWood, who use their business to help the less fortunate receive goods they need. Be it food, clothing, shoes or medical.

For me, all of these groups and companies are serving an exact purpose. Wether we agree or disagree with their practice, or the way they do what they do, the point is that they are getting it done. I for one am for it. To the best of my understanding, the majority of the activist and conservationist groups are doing what they can to maintain the non-violent action towards humans that oppose their efforts. But this by no means makes them backdown if and when confrontation arises. They do defend themselves when threatened with their lives and the lives of others. They are, most of the time, in war-zones and hostile environments.

Before I started writing this entry, I can not help but have his thought that has been in my mind for a while now. It started after reading a book I recently purchased titled "Date Your Wife." A rather interesting view on marriage and how to keep it up and running at full steam and keep it successful. The author starts the book out by telling the story of Adam and Eve when they were still called Man and Woman. We all know how the story of their meeting goes. But the author meditates and dissects the story a bit further.

God creates the world. Night and Day, Sun and Moon, Land and Sea, Desserts and Forrest, Plants and Animals. Then in the final phase of creation, God creates Man in the likeness of Himself and the Angels. After he creates man, He places him in the Garden. Then He tells the man to cultivate the land and be sure it flourishes. Then while doing these tasks, God notices man becomes tired and instructs him to find himself a helper among the creatures of the land. During this time of creation there was no strife between man and beast. The strife came from a curse later in the story. But during his search for a helper, man found nothing suitable for his needs. So God put the man to sleep and formed woman from his rib.

The reason I talk about this story and how it all comes together with what I wrote above is this; God formed man in the final stages of creation. First He constructed the planet, the lands, the waters, the vegetation, the beasts, the birds, and the things below the surfaces. THEN He created man. There was no strife among any living creature. So God told the man to "Cultivate the Garden, make sure that it flourishes." Man's only assignment was to make sure the creation that he was placed in stayed healthy and continued to produce good things.

Fast forward to present day, and take a real precise and accurate look at the garden now. Do it with open eyes. If you take the time and energy to do this you too will see the disarray and dysfunction that is taking place. On both the local and international plains, Man has put himself in the position of God. Man makes decisions without regard to cultivation or the benefit of life, he makes the decision based on profits, power and position. Where we were once blessed to be in position of Dominion, we have now made a cursed and greedy position. We have made "Dominion" a control position instead of an in charge position. Plagued by years of "Tradition" and the mindsets of "That's how our ancestors did it." The sad news for eyes like this is that WE ARE NOT OUR ANCESTORS. We have become more educated and more experienced in our endeavors. We have the knowledge of what is good and what is un-beneficial to all life forms.

People like the Sea Shepherds and the Animal Liberation Groups understand that man's greed and perverse vision of dominion is destroying our home. We are depleting our natural resources as well as our environment for he sake of money and power. Activist groups evolved in Trafficking and Slavery groups understand that the exploitation of humans is counteractive to the progression and harmony of creation. There are a million groups and companies that could be named, all of them flying both under the radar and in the international eye. All of them getting right up in the face of the enemy.

But who is the enemy? The answer; YOU, ME, and everyone else who partakes in the destruction of the Garden.

With the understanding of funding issues, and society placements, I know not everyone can make a grand scale impact on the cultivation process. But everything that has major purpose, STARTS as a small and simple action. Then snowballs into routine and habitual actions, and with enough motivation and support it becomes a Movement!

Take a few moments after reading this if you will, put the computer or digital devise down, and just look around. Look out your window, stand on your porch, or in your front yard. Really LOOK. The things you see around you, THIS is your Garden. Wether city, country or suburbs, You live in the Garden. You are blessed to have this creation in the state it is in. It could be worse! It can always be worse! But the reason it is not, is because their are people you do not know, people you may never meet or see in real life, people who will never see media attention in a positive light, if at all. There are brothers and sisters putting their lives on the line, LITERALLY, to keep the balance in the Garden.

When you are done really seeing what is around you, take some time to seek out ways you can help the Cultivation Process. Conscious decisions like paper instead of plastic. Recycled instead of New. Consume less. Turn down the heat and put on more layers. Donate all your unused items to ministries like Salvation Army, Good Will, and other more minor ones. Walk, ride a bike, or use some skates to get around your local areas instead of driving (weather permitting.)

My personal challenge to the readers, seriously look into Vegetarianism or Veganism. There is nothing but beneficial repercussions all across the board when you make this decision. These decision help you both health wise and living wise. It benefits the environment, it lowers the amount of deaths in he animal kingdom, it destroys diseases, it cuts back on waste and trash. It is all part of the Garden and it's cultivation. It takes effort, and it takes conscious decision making. But the benefits outweigh any reason you can make to say no.

On a heavier note, if you consider yourself a Christian, or a follower of Christ, or however you want to say it, I believe it is our duty to be Vegetarian/Vegan. When you read the text, There was no call for the eating of animals. All animals and beings lived in harmony and were told to eat of the trees and plants and grains. It wasn't until the flood subsided that God "aloud" man to eat animals. But with this allowance came a curse. God placed strife between man and beast, and if man was going to eat them, he was REQUIRED to give an account (acceptable reason) for the lifeblood he took. Usually this was applied to animals used for Sacrifice of Sin or Celebration and Feasts. So unless you personally collect the meat and fish you feed your family with, (and I do not mean from the market) there is no reason to partake in the eating of animals and marine life. Look into it, the book of Genesis, it is in the text.

2013, a time for awareness, a time for cultivation. Be part of the change, and watch where it can take you.